Who's Loving You?

"Who's loving You?"

Remember this song from Terence Trent D'Arby's debut Album:  "Introducing The Hardline According to Terence Trent D'Arby?"  It was so so fresh when it came out in 1987 we all thought we'd died and gone to heaven.  It was just about the time Jazzie B and Soul II Soul came out with "Back to Life".  It was the kind of music you heard and instantly knew it was going to transform your life.  You had no idea how, but you knew things were now different.  It was exciting, original, and bloody damn good!  I've no idea what any of the artists I mentioned above are doing now, since they're no longer releasing music to the public (as far as I know).

The thought I had was this, when I listen to great music, I feel loved.  A good song will express exactly the same sentiment that YOU could have written, but clearly didn't .  It moves you emotionally and tonally to a point of dementia for those around you who have to hear it for the 15th time and may not share your sentiments about the genius in the music.  Seriously, when D'Angelo wails "How does it feel", I answer him.  It's a less important question for me to answer (for now anyway) than it is for me to ask myself the feelings I had when listening to the song for the very first time.

Feelings change, but we still remember how music made us feel at a particular time.  I love good solid vocals, great lyrics, and a wicked tune that won't get out of your head.

"Who's Loving You" is one of those songs from TTD that was not as celebrated as say "If you let me stay" and "Sign Your name".  I still remember every lyric of every track, and could even start singing the note that I know will come next after the end of the previous song.

There's a huge collection in my playlist, which I'm always expanding on; but truth is I'm so boring and predictable that I tend to play and listen to the music I know from before much, much more than I do music I've recently been introduced to.  Mxo, Nomfusi and the Lucky Charms (love the name) & that British sensation Adele is a great example of the newbies that are now part of my collection.

A friend of a friend (ahem) recently went on a 3 hour site visit with her boss, a  particularly vexatious member of government who is constantly in the news about one thing or another and is not a most likable member of the new establishment.  Dude actually barred my friend from playing ANY music during the trip.  What kind of creature does that?  Someone who needs a lot of hugs, I suspect.

So, who's loving you lately?

On Top of the World

This picture was taken at about 9:30 this morning at Lion's Head, part of the magnificent Table Mountain range in Cape Town.  To my left in the distance somewhere is my apartment.  Every morning when I get up, I get to see this site from the other side.  I can barely make out where my flat is up here, but from my kitchen and bedroom windows, the top does not seem so far.  Optical illusions.  Is this blog even real?

And to think I was going to be my usual self and cancel.  It seemed like a great idea last night, but when you're cuddled with the warm blankets, this "reason" now seems entirely unreasonable.  But I forced myself out of the house and had a fantastic (and not easy) experience.  I huffed, and I puffed.  I cursed my tobacco habit, but once on the top, I couldn't remember any of these excuses.

To my right is Ntsiki and then Marcella.  Marcella and I have known each other for about 5 years.  It was love at first sight, what can I say.  A Colombian native, we met through a mutual friend everybody calls The General.  Incidentally, The General and I met in Cape Town in 1997.  It was my first job back in the country.  I remember still living in the USA and everybody saying "It's going to be so easy for you to get a job, having an American Degree and all."  They lied.  None of the "contacts" I'd made who promised me access had bothered to stay in contact, even after repeated prodding.  It was a hard lesson in human relations, but worth every second.  You need these hard knocks in life to set you on the straight and narrow.

It had taken me 6 weeks to land this job, and my mom was still asking me "exactly what it is you're doing"?  Actually, not much has changed.  My mom still asks me the same question, but I've made it work for so long now that she knows that I'll be ok, whatever it is I am or will be doing. I was an associate producer on a documentary series called Africa, Search for Common Ground.  It was produced by Ubuntu productions, and I remember landing in Cape Town and thinking:  "I am never leaving here.".  Well, I left, and came back, and left.  And now I'm back again.  Like I said, not much has changed.

I've cleaned two loads of laundry.  The oven has been simmering with a Kgomotso's Pocco Bucco (using pork instead of veal, and then of course I didn't have celery and carrots so I had to improvise, hence my signature on the dish).  I'm grilling cougettes and pumpkin.  For the past 3 days I've been fermenting mabele to make Ting, a sour traditional SeTswana, sorghum based grain that also used to brew traditional beer.

I'm drinking red wine and taking a break from cooking to write this.

Excuse me.  Lunch is served.

40 And Counting

I'm feeling better today than I have in a while.  It has nothing to do with the fact that I turned 40 yesterday and more to do with the fact that I had a very good run on the promenade this morning.  I've been walking 4 days a week since the Nike Jozi Night Run 3 weeks ago, and today was the first time since then I actually ran, and it felt good. While I walked most of the 10k this morning, I ran much further than I thought I could.  Which is how it always is with running, as with life.  The limitations I put in front of me are far greater than any obstacles by a third party.

Now with knowledge like that you'd think that would motivate me to run every day, but it doesn't.  I have been battling a persistent chest infection over the past month (you'd think I'd quit smoking already) and had to take a break.  I kept walking so I wouldn't lose my momentum, and because it's almost as good as running.  Because I'm wary of making my body immune to anti biotics, I avoided the doctor, since that's exactly what she would have done.  Sometimes you just need to tough it up and let your body feel it's worst before it can get better.

I got my white board and it's mounted above my desk.  Let's hope it lasts longer than a new year's resolution.  So all this means is that the bucket list has begun.  I suppose it comes with the whole territory of a "big" age like 40 and with all the personal and professional transitions I'm experiencing, to look at the big picture that is my life and ask: "WTF am I doing here?"

I have a lot on my mind, which is the only reason I've decided to blog.  Writing has become something that I do to get paid, and there's something about going back to the basics of doing for the pure love and fun of it that I miss.

On my way to get the board I walked past a horrible stench of rot.  A turn of the eye revealed the source to be a homeless man who was begging for money.  The source of the stench seemed to stem from his feet, which were discoloured and swollen, and obviously infected.  On my way back I could not avoid his stare, and was shamed into dropping a coin into his paper cup.  "You have to get help, the smell is really bad and your feet look terrible", I said.  Stating the obvious.  He just said "I know," and I'm sure he was as happy to get rid of my pitying stares as I was to get away from his smell.

If I really cared about this person, I'd do something to help them, right?  Well what exactly should I have done, and should I then do it for everyone I come across?  Surely someone in our system should be able to help the man, but who, and how?  I gave him a pitiful coin and got my new purchases in my car.  It was the lamest show of detached guilt I've ever practiced.  I did not even offer to take him to the hospital, because I honestly couldn't bear the thought or smell of him in my car.

How the hell are you supposed to take a bath when you're living on the street anyway?